Around the world freedom loving citizens are rising up and speaking out against oppressive regimes. For the latest, we now take you to our fearless reporter at the epicenter of the latest battle…
Thanks Jim. Protests continued Wednesday as the Apple corporation moves forward with a plan to enact free content reform. If ratified the measure will add a surcharge to the previously free internet content enjoyed by millions of people around the world.
In response to the protests, a small group of angry birds were pulled away from clashes with insurgent pigs in nearby San Jose and redeployed to disperse about 200 protesters outside Apple’s Cupertino headquarters, state media reported. The iProtestors were demanding that the ‘one-click experience for auto-renewable digital subscriptions’ not be enacted by the company.
Meanwhile, the once free content industry has formed an apolitical and independent constitutional committee to propose their own constitutional free content reforms within 10 days, according to activist Andy Droid.
While no public statement has been made, it is believed that content producers will band together to ensure no member steps out of line and continues providing free content. It is known that several former OPEC Oil Ministers have been consulted to help determine how the new content consortium will conduct business. When trying to assess the potential implications of paid content, one critic, as an example, predicted that the cost of NFL related stories would soar in the lead up to the Super Bowl and slowly decline back to normal levels during the long summer months.
Banks and the stock market have also closed amid fears Apple will begin looking at financial applications as additional means to boost the kingdom’s finances.
Noticeably absent from public view during the current controversy is Steve Jobs, who is currently rumored to be lobbying behind the scenes to create another new mandate requiring all citizens to purchase an iPhone at birth. If successful, Jobs will reportedly demand an Apple tax be added to the purchase of any product not starting with the letter ‘i’.
Now back to the studio for the latest on the protests breaking out in the Duchy of Grand Fenwick over the government attempts to silence the mouse that roared…
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Tags: 2011 Trends, Apple, Business Case, Ed Dekema, iPhone, Mobile Dog, Mobile Masters - General
